Well, as you already know, your big brother gave us quite a scare yesterday. When I heard the ambulance was picking him up, I had flashbacks to you. I didn't want to think the worst, but I have to admit, it wasn't far from my mind.
But thankfully he was alright and we are just keeping a close eye on him. I hope he is back to himself soon. Please stay with him and get him better quickly. He needs some extra angel kisses and hugs today.
I love you sweet girl. I am missing you so much. Wishing you were here...
Days like today / Mommy
Well Princess, I am going to use this as a place to get my feelings out. I know everyone will read this and worry, but I need to really just say how I am feeling.
When people ask me how I am doing, I say Okay. Here's the truth. Most days I am okay. My day goes along pretty "normal" with thoughts of you always on my mind. But most days I can think of you and smile. I think of you and all the memories and my heart is filled with love. Even though I have to force a smile and laugh, I am okay, most days.
But I also have days like today. Days I feel like just running away. I just don't have the energy or desire to fight anymore. Days I feel so horrible that I don't think your brothers need me here. Days when all I can think about is you and the pain you were in and why I never knew. A mother is suppose to know when her child is in pain. We are suppose to have an "intuition". But I didn't. You were having heart attacks and I didn't even know!! Days like today the guilt is so bad I cannot take it.
Days like today I hate who I have become. I have become this person who is dependant on drugs. (prescribed of course) Whenever I think I am doing okay and do not need them anymore...I have alot of bad days. I do not want to take drugs to lvie my life. I just don't! I hate the wife and mother I am on days like today. Because I want to be alone, but I can't be alone. It's the hardest feeling in the world to handle. Feeling so alone with a room full of people. Everyone else has moved on, without drugs, why can't I?
Days like today princess makes it so hard to live without you. I want you back to bad it hurts. Days like today I look at your baby brother and and grateful for your gift, but so very sad too. I love him with all of my heart, but days like today, I feel he is the reason I had to move on so quickly. I wasn't ready for many things, but i had to be in order to be ready for him. Days like today, I just want you back.
Days like today, I wish I had your princess bedroom. I wish I was sitting in your rocker with your crib next to me and thinking of your sweet face. Instead I have no place to go that was yours. I have nowhere that i can sit and know you are there with me.
But I know tomorrow is a new day and days like today won't last forever. Please stay close to me. It's Kyle's birthday today and I won't be with him to celebrate, which is so very hard for me to do.
I love you so very much my beautiful baby girl. Please know that on days like today and my good days, you are ALWAYS on my mind, ALWAYS in my heart.
Hi sweet princess / Amanda
I am having a really bad day. It was my night off so I decided to go walk around Walmart for something to do. Everywhere I went I saw things that reminded me of you. I saw a Christmas stocking that had your name written all over it. It was blue and had angel wings on it along with the word angel. (I looked, there was no pink.) I also go a stuffed penguin with pink ear muffs and a pink coat that said princess. I just can't seem to get you out of my mind. I'm thinking of you always. Kisses to heaven for you and Tyler. Amanda Close
Good Morning Princess / Mommy
Good Morning my Sweet Princess...
I have been thinking about you so much lately. Your little brother is turning out to look just like you. Which is a bittersweet thing. I love that I have someone to remind me of you, but it also hurts too.
Leyton's baptism was great, but I know you were there. It was a little hard to light a candle in your memory and then turn around and be happy for Leyton's baptism. But we did it and it was perfect.
I am missing you like crazy baby girl. I wish you were here with us and getting ready for the holidays. Just when I seem to be doing okay, life hits me like a brick wall and I realize you are gone. Just this week someone asked me how many kids I had. I plain as day said 3 boys and a girl. I talked about you like you were here, then it hit me when she asked how old you were, you were gone. I don't know why or what brought it on, but it hit my like a ton of bricks. Little things like that are so hard to get use to in this new thing of life.
Have a wonderful day in heaven, flying with all the angels. I will be missing and loving you as always.
Be with Grandma Judi for her surgery today and during her recovery. She is too stubborn to ask for help, so be with her. I know she needs you today.
Kisses to heaven my beautiful angel. I miss and love you more than life itself.
Hugs and Kisses to our Prince and Princess / Grandma Judi Read >>
Hugs and Kisses to our Prince and Princess / Grandma Judi
Hi Jalyn, Hi Dylan,
Grandma just wanted to tell you that mom did a beautiful job giving her speech for the American Heart Association. There wasn't a dry eye in the room. We sent her speech and Kyle's letter for the hoops for hearts to lots of people on our e-mail list. He got over 625.00 already from strangers to help support the research. He does it out of love for the two of you, his little brother and sister. Please watch over him, Carter and Leyton. We had Leyton baptism and Kyle's birthday on Saturday. It was a wonderful time but you know that don't you? It's getting around to the holiday season so you little ones have to stay close to mom and see that she gets to smile more. We all miss and love you both. Kisses to you and all the angel babies in heaven. Give Jesse a big kiss and pull on his ear for me. Say hi and give kisses to great papa too. Love you both lots XXXXXOOOOO Kisses to heaven. Close
Sorry I missed your bday. / Erica Ritchie
Hey there girl! Sorry I missed your birthday! So today I wish you a belated happy bday to you. The big 1. You are so beautiful inside and out, just like your mommy.
Just wanted to let you know I was thinkin of you today. Miss ya!
Speech in your honor / Mommy
Good Morning Sweet Princess~
I hope you are having a wonderful day in heaven. We miss you so much down here.
Tonight I am giving a speech to the American Heart Association and PE teachers in your honor. I hope I make you proud. I am so very nervous and wish your daddy was coming, he always seems to lighten the mood.
Stay close tonight while I do my speech and give me the strength to make it through.
Thank you so much for being with me and Leyton yesterday at his appointment. It was such a relief that everything turned out okay. Though I knew in the back of my head that you would never let him be sick.
I love you so much sweet princess. Hopefully tonight we will change someones life with the story of your short life.
Happy Birthday In Heaven Poem / Mommy
I heard you crying yesterday And felt your heart-sent love So I’m sending you this message Now, from Heaven up above.
You’re wondering if I’ll celebrate My birthday (way up here) I know you’re missing me today I feel your essence near.
God planned a special day for me He told me with a wink He’d ordered me a special cake (It’s Angel food, I think)
I’m getting lots of hugs from God He’s really good at that And every time that I walk by He gives my head a pat
Balloons will fill the streets for me They float up through the clouds And we have lots of clowns up here That make us laugh out loud
There is a birthday carousel Jeweled horses ride the wind With music playing oh so sweet… The magic never ends
I’ve made so many friends, you see We laugh and play and sing We ride our bikes and play jump rope And sleep in Angel’s wings
We’ll have our cake and ice cream And open gifts, surprise! But we don’t blow out our candles here Instead, they light the skies
Well, today is finally here. I cannot believe one year ago your beautiful face came into my life. I will never forget the first time I heard you cry, saw your face and held your little hand.
Today I have promised myself not to dwell on all that we missed together, but instead of what we had together. We had 82 wonderful days together.... in that 82 days you blessed me so much more than words can say. I know it's crazy since you were not my first baby, and I should not have been so in awe by you, but I was. Maybe somewhere in me, I knew you were a true angel.
So today, my beautiful princess, is your day. It's the day we celebrate you, and even though we will miss you terribly, we will celebrate you and be grateful for the 82 beautiful days we had with you.
Even though I wish you were with us on your birthday, I know you are going to have a wonderful birthday in heaven. Papa LaMarche, Ralph, Dylan and Jesse will give you the princess treatment we would be giving you.
Just know I will be thinking of you all day as I always do. You are my princess and always will be. Stay close to us today, we need you so much.
Birthday kisses to heaven for you. I hope you wear your princess crown today. You truly are a princess in heaven.
I can't believe a year has gone by since you were born. I hope Dylan and Jesse and Ralph and all the angel babies have a huge party for you in heaven. You can wear your princess crown and be royality for the day. Make sure you go see greatgrandpa.
This is your special day baby girl so enjoy it. Please stay close to mom today, she's been going through a rough time. Watch over Leyton. Help him with his problem and give him a good report next week. Mom needs to heal physically too. You know what they need, please ask Jesus and God our father to heal them.
We are all walking this Sunday in the memory walk for you, our princess. I made the T-shirts with your picture on them, with "Fly with the butterflies Princess" and "Kisses to Heaven" on the back. You will probably have the most people walking. Then we're going to Green Bay on Thursday to hear Mom tell your story to the Heart Assoication. We're wearing our shirts there too. Everyone will see you and love you like we do.
Watch over all of us sweet princess. Know that you are loved today and for always. Fly with the butterflies, Princess. Have a Happy Happy 1st birthday in Heaven.
Double Kisses to Heaven for you, Dylan, Jesse, Ralph & Family and all the angel babies especially today.
hello again / Courtney DesArmo (loveing cousin )Read >>
hello again / Courtney DesArmo (loveing cousin )
good morning sweet angel baby. i miss you soo much. this moring i went to church, and when the time came to pray for someone or something, i started to cry. i was thinking about you and how much i missed you. i was thinking of your first smile .. and your last [that i could see.] then i thought about you smileing over me everyday and that made me smile and feel so much better. then i thought alowed to God, WHY? why did you take her from me. and i could hear him respond, "i didnt take her from you, shes always right there if you need her." that made me feel soooo much better because i knew he was right. then i thought, everything happens for a reason. i have a feeling that reason is because of mommys new little hunter Leyton. maybe im right, maybe im not. i dont know. i look at your page atleast 4 times a week on regular basis. i cant stop thinking about you. you'll never ever leave my heart or thoughts. remember that. i miss and love you oh so very much.
XOXO your loveing caring crying cousin, Courtney XOXO Close
i miss you little princess / Courtney Desarmo (loveing cousin )Read >>
i miss you little princess / Courtney Desarmo (loveing cousin )
jalyn jo, i miss you so. i think of you everyday and everynight. i never knew how much emotion i had bottled up inside me untill i looked at your pictures and rememberd how happy you where/are. when God tells me its my time to go, meet me at heavens gates ok? i love you baby jalyn.
As I sit here ready to write to you, I am so filled with emotion I don't even know where to start. First off, thank you so much for your baby brother and his health. He is perfect and beautiful and we could not ask for a more precious gift. He was sent straight from you and I believe this with my whole heart. He is the answer to our prayers and something to warm our empty hearts.
But as I sit here holding him, I am so overwhelmed with memories of you it still hurts. Almost one year ago you came into our lives and filled a spot we didn't even know was empty. You were as beautiful and perfect as your brother is. It just seems so unfair you are gone now. It seems so unfair that this beautiful baby boy will never meet his big sister, will never meet our beautiful princess.
But I am being strong for your brothers and will have your memory live on through them. You will forever be a part of our family.
Tomorrow we are getting our family pictures taken and it feels so wrong to have a family picture without our princess in it. But it is a first of many that I am going to have to deal with. ANd I know I will do fine because you are with us each step of every day.
Well princess, please know that even though we have a new baby to love and hold, you will forever be our princess and NOTHING will ever change that. I will love Leyton with everything I have, but I will NEVER stop loving you.
Stay close these next few weeks and help mommy. I love you and miss you so very much.
Mommy needs your help / Grandma Judi
Good Morning Sweetie,
As you know we have your special gift to us. Leyton arrived on Friday as planned. 9-1 1/2 lbs and 22 1/4" long. Beautiful baby. Mom is not doing as well. The doctors had to reopen her. Jalyn we need you to have all your angel baby friends and their mommy's and daddy's to help mom get better fast. Tell Dylan Great Grandpa, Jesse, Ralph, Robin and all the angels in heaven to put her in their arms and heal her. Ask our heavenly father and our Lord Jesus to watch over all of us and keep us well both in mind and body.
We all miss you sooooo much our sweet princess. My heart still breaks and it hurts so much. Only our heavenly father knows why we couldn't keep you but someday we'll know and we'll be together again. I love you sweet princess. Keep the butterflies coming, I know silly grandma, the butterflies are gone for the season, so send me some kisses. I need them. Here's some kisses for you and Dylan. I love you both. Have a great day in heaven and thank you again for Leyton. He's a beautiful gift.
Your sweet gift is almost here / Mommy
Well sweet Princess, here I sit less than 24 hours when your miracle gift is to be given to me. What emotion!!
I am so ready to hold Leyton and see if he looks just like you and Daddy, but I am so very scared also. I am scared of my emotions for him, I am scared that he will be okay, I am scared that I am not ready for another baby. I have so many worries.
But then I think of you, and they all seem so minor. I know you gave us Leyton and I know you would not take him away. I know you wanted me to have him for a reason I don't see yet. But I will, as soon as I have him in my arms.
But I need you to stay close tomorrow. It's going to be a bittersweet day for mommy and daddy. As much as we want and love Leyton, it's going to bring back so many wonderful memories of you.
Keep Leyton safe and be with us tomorrow. Help Kyle understand that Leyton will be okay also. He is having a hard time as well.
I love you sweet princess and thank you for the beautiful gift I am about to receive.
a song for u / Garrett Griffin (1 cousin )
you gotta do what you gotta do
shes gotta do what shes gotta do and ive gotta like it or not shes got dreams to big for this town and shes needs to give them a shot what ever they are looks like shes all ready to leave nothing left to pack aint no room for me to go but i wish i could go with her but god i gotta be srong thats why im singing this song shes at the startin line the rest of her life shes ready than shes ever been got the hunger and the stars in her eyes she is yours to win she is waitin on my blessins before she hits that trip up there oh baby get ready get set please dont go
Who'd You Be Today.... / Mommy
Here's a song that reminds me of you so very often....loving you princess.
Who You'd Be Today (Bill Luther/Aimee Mayo)
Sunny days seem to hurt the most. I wear the pain like a heavy coat. I feel you everywhere I go. I see your smile, I see your face, I hear you laughin' in the rain. I still can't believe you're gone.
It ain't fair: you died too young, Like the story that had just begun, But death tore the pages all away. God knows how I miss you, All the hell I've been through, Just knowin' no-one could take your place. An' sometimes I wonde
Would you see the world? Would you chase your dreams? Settle down with a family, I wonder what would you name your babies? Some days the sky's so blue, I feel like I can talk to you, An' I know it might sound drazy.
It ain't fair: you died too young, Like the story that had just begun, But death tore the pages all away. God knows how I miss you, All the hell I've been through, Just knowin' no-one could take your place. An' sometimes I wonder, Who you'd be today?
Today, today, today. Today, today, today.
Sunny days seem to hurt the most. I wear the pain like a heavy coat. The only thing that gives me hope, Is I know I'll see you again some day. Close
11 Months Old / Mommy
Happy 11 Month Birthday Jalyn!
Princess, I cannot believe you would be 11 months old today. I have tried my hardest not to live with the "what ifs" in life, but days like today I find myself unable to think about it.
Would you be walking? Would you be saying Mommy? What would you look like?? I am overwhelmed somedays with who you would be.
The seasons are changing, so the butterflies are no longer as prominate as they were and that is hard. Maybe I needed those butterflies more than I thought I did. But even with no butterflies I know you are with me.
Sweet baby girl I miss you so much lately. Leyton will be here in ten short days and I am so scared I cannot begin to tell you. Though I know you already know as you are with me as I shed each tear.
Stay close to mommy these next few weeks. I will need you so much. And I know when I hold Leyton for the first time, I will be holding a special gift from you. A gift that will not only be a part of me and daddy, but also you.
So have a wonderful 11 month birthday today princess. You are almost one!! I cannot believe where a year has gone. It seems like just yesterday I held you for the first time. My beautiful princess was finally in my arms.
I love you and miss you like always baby girl. Sweet kisses to heaven just for you!!
Tributes and Condolences
Add to favorites 
